The Writing Life, or Everyone's a Critic(ally undereducated oaf)

First off, the examples definitely are not "analogies," so the 'author' of the page is either an idiot or making a bad joke badly. Most of the examples are similies.

Secondly, more than half of them are not bad (or worse or worst,) but quite good. If you're not a ridiculously rule-bound high school English teacher. E.e.g. " The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't." I think that's clever, though I'd say 'drifted gently.'

"From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and 'Jeopardy' comes on at 7 p.m. instead of 7:30." I think that's fantastic. I'm sorry that kid's teacher was such a Militant Grammarian that she/he couldn't accept a joke. But then that's life, at least in American public schools it is.

The Worst Analogies Ever Written in a High School Essay

On the other hand, if they were supposed to be analogies, then they're all terrible. And on the third hand (we live near a nuclear plant,) maybe my liking them means that I am in fact 'the idiot.' Which is fine with me, I'd be proud to be the inspiration for Dostoevsky's great novel.